Monday, November 14, 2011

Introducing Rebecca Gayley, friend extraordinaire.

This week  I would like to introduce to you my wonderful friend Rebecca Gayley.  Rebecca is a graduate of the University of Oregon class of 1994!  She has worked for The Statesman Journal and landed her husband while covering his high school basketball game.  Rebecca boasts a yahtzee score of 490 and has the cutest little poochy poo name Coco Puff. (oh yeah, and two pretty great boys and husband too) We go way back, and will go way forward.  I know I will always have the best time when we are together and I can't forget to mention that she has texted me EVERY single day since I moved!!! What a friend.

This was us last year watching the civil war together!  Probably one of the funnest days we have had together.  And I am pretty sure it was one of the best days for the guy in the background of the second picture too! 

So without further adieu, I give you the first guest blog post from my dear friend RG

A couple of months ago, I try to forget the exact date, my friend Nicole (you all know Nicole) announced she, Matt, Madels & Jude were MOVING....! Who's this Matt person, I wondered? I had spent many months hanging out with Nicole at her house, eating tuna sandwiches & drinking iced tea. Jude & Bret took a few playdates to actually enjoy each other's company, but our patience and lack of meddling (rare) paid off and they became great friends. Madels named her Teddy Bear hamster after my toy poodle, CocoPuff. Life was BEAUTIFUL!! But Matt? Hmmm... Never heard of him.
Matt is like my husband: he works -- a lot! I did, one rare occasion, catch a glimpse of this elusive husband. Nice guy.
BUT WHY O WHY WOULD HE TAKE MY NICOLE AWAY??
Denial turned to reality and the Kings were on the road to Pullman, WA. Packed up, shipped out. LAME.
Equally lame is moving to WASHINGTON, of all places! Yes, it's fairly close when you check out a map. Vancouver is just a bridge ride from Portland. But Pullman, home to the Washington State Cougars, a Pac 12 team, is home to well, just that. Not much else. Not even a Target?!? Good luck with that, Nicole. Pullman is a whopping 8-hour drive along some random highway in an easterly direction. (I think, anyway.) It's closer to Idaho than Oregon. Ugh.
Little did I know that I would be driving to Washington nearly every week... but nowhere near Nicole.
I drive to Seattle, the Emerald City from Salem, the Cherry one (What is Pullman's moniker, Nicole? Please share) nearly ever week. I am pretty sure every state thinks its neighboring state has the WORST drivers; Rest Assured: OREGON AND IDAHO ARE CORRECT THAT WASHINGTON HAS THE WORST DRIVERS EVER. I am super hoping Nicole moves back to Oregon before they get her & turn her to the dark side.
Oregon drivers, let's play a little game, shall we?
FACT: The speed limit on I 5 from Vancouver to Seattle is either 60 or 70. Question: When the speed limit is 60, how fast do you drive? The correct answer is 65. Thank you. When the speed limit is 70, how fast do you drive? If you said 72-75, you are correct! You are a good driver. But if you are a typical Washington driver, you would have answered 55 and 68, respectively. Please go back to Driver's Ed. You FAIL!
FACT: Road construction is inevitable in Washington. Question: When there are orange cones and barrels and people working in the rain, and the speed limit drops to 50, how fast do you drive? The correct answer is 50! Set your cruise control! People's lives are on the line!! If you are a typical Washington driver, you accelerate to 60 or more. FAIL!
FACT: The left lane is the PASSING LANE. You use it to pass slower drivers. Question: If the speed limit is 70, and you are in the passing lane, are you passing a slower driver? If you said, NO, I simply like this lane the best, it's my favorite. CONGRATULATIONS: YOU ARE A TYPICAL WASHINGTON DRIVER. PICK UP YOUR NEW PLATES!
FACT: A parking lot is for parking your car. Question: When you are parking your vehicle in a parking lot, do you drive through the main corridors looking for a prime parking spot? The correct answer is YES. If you are a typical Washington driver, however, you drive willy nilly through the parking lines and almost crash into drivers simply trying to park. Remember this is a parking lot, not a freeway. I know it is confusing. Parking lot: park. Freeway: Drive. Maybe make yourself some flash cards to practice these points.
FACT: Seattle has a lot of people (including students, tech-savvy Microsoft employees, tourists, commuters and even, Canadians, eh?!) who very often use the freeway to get from once place to another. In this way, Seattle is a lot like other big cities. To help drivers along, there are signs along the freeway, for example: EXIT ONLY. Question: When you are in a lane and there is a sign that reads EXIT ONLY, do you A, stay in that lane because you need to exit, or B, signal and get out out that lane because you do not need to exit? The correct answer is A Or B. If you answered, I DON'T KNOW BUT I WILL WAIT TO THE VERY LAST MILLISECOND TO DECIDE THEN EITHER CUT YOU OFF GETTING OUT OF THE LANE OR CUT YOU OFF TO GET INTO THE LANE, you, my dear, are a full-fledged, card-carrying Washington driver. Your car has lots of dents, your signal is broken, but your cappuccino is near perfect!
One of these days, I will meander off Interstate Five, and take the road less traveled and visit the Kings. Yes, I am afraid! But I am bold and I know the ways of the Washingtonian... and I will succeed.

PS: I don't cook often enough to blog about cooking.



4 comments:

  1. Oh Rebecca you make me laugh!

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  2. Probably the funniest thing I've read since last night when I wrote it. Also I graduated UO in 1989, which makes me 1000 dozen years old. Nicole King: your blog completes me.

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  3. Happy Early Thanksgiving! :) Stopping by from the Blog Hop. Looking for new subscribers to my blog 

so come on over and check it out. Hope you visit, like and follow my site.

...If you follow I will certainly follow you back. 

    www.Botanical-Balance.com

    www.DrinkYourGreensandMinerals.com

    ReplyDelete
  4. I am following you through the Thanksgiving edition of Finding New Friends Weekend Blog Hop.

    Joanna
    http://joannalife.com

    ReplyDelete

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